The Latest Report  from the CIA (Cedros Intelligence Agency)

August18th - The Headlines: Indoor Tourism? - T&TEC Bargain Rates? - Jobs, Sex and Tsunamis

The Ultimate Eco Tourism Project - Bringing Tourism Indoors

Do you know what most 'eco tourist countries' definition of Eco-Tourism is? We got no decent beaches but come anyway! Dominica went that route since they were not blessed with nice sandy beaches like us here in Cedros and now they promote the "country of 100 rivers" and call it eco-tourism. Now if the Technocrats get their way, the wonderful stretches of sandy beaches in the Cedros Peninsua will all be paved soon, leaving what? Eco Tourism? Parking Lot Tourism...maybe Industrial Tourism?

But do not worry, you know Government always has a plan. Newly appointed Minister of Tourism Howie Chin Lee has the answer: Indoor Tourism. For a few weeks now we see the ads in the newspapers: Visit "Tourism Park" Only in the gas-powered, oil-driven country of Trinidad would you put a "Tourism Park" indoors right off the Priority Bus Route.

The CIA has a better idea. How about Cedros Tourism Park? We still got the long sandy beaches, no traffic jams and you don't even have to call it eco-tourism since Cedros got blessed by nature a seasoned tourist expects from a vacation spot.

Electricity Rates going up? The CIA Inquires Why?

Are you getting ready to pay more for your electricity just when we are supposed to be in an economic boom because of higher oil prices? The CIA decided to investigate why the sudden rush to raise rates. You know we'd like to blame everything on Alcoa if we could but guess who is responsible for our coming rate increase? Yes, Alcoa. It seems like Aluminum Giant Alcoa likes Trinidad for one reason only, low electricity rates. These smart Pennsylvanians managed to negotiate an electricity rate of 9 cents for their smelter while everybody else in the country has to pay 15 cents (and more soon). And since an aluminum smelter uses almost as much electricity as a small island (say, Trinidad) somebody will have foot pay for this "cheap electricity" Well, that would be us. So, if you felt, you've been 'left in the dark' (no pun intended) about your electricity rate increase, now you know. Alcoa pays 9 cents, you pay 15 cents

Jobs, Jobs, Jobs

One of the reasons we hear over and over for the industrial monster now heading deep South with Smelters, Ethylene Plants, Ammonia Plants and other smelly activities is to 'create jobs'. But at the same time we are reading of the growing shortage of labour in the country. We are planning to import workers by the thousands now. So, we are importing foreign industry to create jobs for foreign workers? And we give them discount gas and electricity. Is there a benefit for Trinidad anywhere in this scheme?

I hope that fact will be clear in everybody's mind when they try to "re-locate" people for these industrial projects. You can only do that for a "public purpose" and even if you feel like you could stretch the law like bubble gum to mean "public interest", foreign companies using foreign labour does not constitute 'public' anything.

So while we are busy watching foreign companies cash in on 9 cent electricity and foreign workers flood our country what shall we do with our newfound spare time? Not have Sex of course, that could possibly lead to children and they would want to eat food in another couple of years while 'agriculture is dead' and the fishes are floating belly up in the Gulf of Paria. Let's watch TV instead is the advice of "The Birth Control Guru" PM.

Let's just hope the Tsunami comes rushing in soon and everybody who can't quite make it into the Tarouba stadium in time will be taken off the food chain. With so much clever thinking coming from the people running the country, the IMF conclusion that Trinidad may be bankrupt in 2020 hardly raises an eyebrow anymore.